North Korea: South Korea cheated at soccer

In a shocking diplomatic development, North Korea's news agency officially accused South Korean President Lee Myung-Bak, in cahoots with nefarious international actors Oman and Japan, of cheating in a football match. I am not making this up.

The North first accuses malcontents in Oman of poisoning their football team in advance of their Asian Cup Qualifier with their bitter rivals, the South Koreans, with whom they are still technically at war. They then accuse the refs of stealing the game, at President Lee's behalf:

Moreover, the Oman chief referee was so seriously biased in refereeing at the match that he insisted the ball headed by our player into the goal mouth at about 6 minutes after the start of the second half of the match was not the goal. He also declared that the foul committed by the rival side about 3 minutes before the end of the match was our player's though it was an obvious foul on the part of the rival side, thus resulting in the loss of our team.

It was something surprising that the Japanese refereeing supervisor tacitly connived at this shameless behavior though he was obliged to ensure the fair refereeing.

The match thus turned into a theatre of plot-breeding and swindling. It is as clear as noonday that it was a product of the Lee Myung Bak group's moves for confrontation with the DPRK and a deliberate behavior bred by the unsavory forces instigated by it.

Talk about sore losers, jeez. With rhetoric like that, this could be the start of the second Football War in world history. (The first, of course, being the infamous El Salvador-Honduras war of 1969.)