when accused of genocide, don't use the phrase "final solution"

Sudan's ever-quotable Ambassador to the United Nations, Abdalmahmood Abdalhaleem Mohamad, had a press conference today after the indictment of President Omar al-Bashir.

Key arguments that Mohamad made:

1. This indictment isn't happening:

According to Sudan, the ICC doesn't exist, and the indictment isn't worth the ink used to print it. It is an insult to justice and it is a demonstration only for the Euro-American justice which caused destruction in Afghanistan, Iraq and Gaza.

2. Actually, the war in Darfur isn't happening either:

Every day in Gaza, these images come every day to our bedrooms and we see them. In Afghanistan, everything can be captured and brought to our bedroom. Have you ever seen anything in Darfur, these 300,000? It's a big lie. And these lies are becoming weapons of mass destruction in our case.

3. You see, George Clooney made it up, and Save Darfur's only in it for the money:

The Darfur issue was blown out of proportion, in which all walks of life came to intervene in the internal affairs of the country, actors, mobilization of actors, and organizations who are war-mongers and money-makers like Human Rights Watch, Human Rights Now, and Save Darfur Coalition.

4. Darfur is a "traditional conflict" (sadly, given the nature of previous Sudanese wars, this is rather accurate) and Sudan will solve it on its own, thank you very much:

We are not surprised that a traditional conflict was blown out of proportion and has become a job of the jobless, and indeed we are not at all going to demand article 16 because our demand now is to dismiss this whole criminal plot against our country. I said the decision is a recipe for disaster and anarchy, and indeed it's intended to fragment our country and create chaos in it, but we are not going to fall into their trap. Exactly the opposite. What we are going to do is, we are already consolidating the domestic front in our country. The President's popularity is increasing by day. Our people are very much solid behind the President.

5. It's all the lawyers' fault:

The biggest value of justice is peace. So we are going to deliver this peace for our people, and also to remind those that are talking heavily on the ICC that it is not only through litigation that justice is established. We have a model in South Africa through our own traditional matters to achieve justice even without going through the courts.

6. Lady Macbeth had it right.

7. There will be peace at any price:

We will continue to peace process, starting with the Doha process, and reaching a final and lasting solution to the problem of Darfur, whatever the cost might be.

Priceless stuff, here...